Holley Gerth’s book, You’re Made For A God-Sized Dream will always hold a special place in my heart. You see, this is the book that started it all. My mom (Holley) had donated a ton of copies of this book to the house I was living at. After reading this book, I found her number and just wanted to thank her because the book had helped me so much. She asked me to hang out, and the rest is history.
I had a dream that seemed so small and silly, and so I tucked it away deep in my heart. I tried to avoid thinking about it because I feared that I would fail and be rejected. Through this book I laid everything out before God, admitting that I had a dream of being married, for the very first time.
The church had drilled it into my head that I should be content with where God had me. If I had a dollar for every time I heard the phrases, “Give it to God” and “Date God”, I’m pretty sure I could have paid for my entire wedding. So I lived in fear that I was letting God down by desiring a husband. I didn’t have anyone to sit me down and walk me through the emotions that came with loneliness.
Looking back I can’t help but smile because my mom was parenting me through her books before she even met me. The adversary used to hold me captive with fear. I feared that I was damaged goods and not good enough to be loved by anyone.
Fear is a liar.Click To TweetI eventually stepped out in faith and let people get to know me. The real me. They saw the good, the bad, and the ugly. I felt naked, exposed, and vulnerable. It scared the heck out of me. Underneath my “independent” facade was a girl who wanted to be loved so badly it hurt. A girl who couldn’t believe a guy chose her. I was in such disbelief that I would frequently find myself saying,“promise you aren’t going anywhere?” a million times a day.
I’d trusted God, let people in, and was terrified of letting them go.
Underneath my cemented outer shell was fear that someone would walk away when they saw what I saw. I thought the couple that wanted to be my parents would walk away when they found something better. I thought they deserved something better.
God walked with me through my fear and slowly, I began to trust. I didn’t have to ask that guy if he was staying because I knew he was here forever. He even gave me a ring to prove it. I could show the roller coaster of emotions I had to my parents as we learned to live life as a family. I knew that they would love me through my trauma.
I stopped living the lie that I wasn’t good enough because my parents and husband treated me like I was. Slowly, I began to see myself the way God does, and I’ve never looked back. I am so thankful that I didn’t give in to my fears because If I had, I wouldn’t have a mom, dad, husband, and daughter. I’d still be lonely, looking at that book, wishing but never trusting…and not allowing God to make my desires a reality.
I would have missed out on His best for me.
~ Lovelle <3
Shared by: Lovelle Gerth-Myers
Photo by Scott Webb on Unsplash
Reading to the end with a lump in my throat, Lovelle. Your beautiful story puts the love and kind attention of God on display in a way that builds my faith and helps me to trust Him with my own small dreams.
Thank you so much for your sweet words Michele. They truly mean the world. The Lord has been so good to me. My only desire is to tell others about it.
Such a beautiful story. Your heart shines through. Thank you for writing brave and living braver, full of hope for all God has for you! What an amazing way He has blessed you (and I’m pretty sure your mom too!)
Thank you so much Becky! I appreciate your kind words. <3
Reading this post brought such emotion. Lovelle, your story so beautifully illustrates the precious way God truly sets us in families. You inspire us all to continue to trust God with our own families, and with our dreams!
Thank you so much Joanne! I appreciate the encouragement so much. <3
Dear Lovelle, you’ve started my day off right with your testimony! Thank you for your candor and your witness about the importance of trust. Blessings on you and your remarkable family!
Thank you for starting your morning off here avwalters55! Your presence is such an encouragement to me. I am so glad that God’s faithfulness in my life can encourage you. He’s just so good. <3
What a story, Lovelle! Only God writes redemption stories with such beautiful beginnings and endings. Your transparency as you described your deepest desire reminds me how I also need to name my dream and hand it over to God. Thank you for the blessing of your words today.
Thank you for the sweet words Mary. They truly mean the world. God writes the most amazing and unique stories. Claim that dream girl! He wouldn’t put it in your heart if it wasn’t supposed to be there. Don’t let fear hold you back from God’s blessing. He is ALWAYS faithful. <3
I love you and will be forever grateful that God had the dream of making us a family. 🙂
Love you too mom and am so grateful for you and dad. You’ve helped me so much and have made my dreams come true. I am forever grateful. Ellie, David, and I love you!
Such an amazing story. Praise the Lord! Thanks for this sweet testimony!
Thanks for stopping by mbethany! The Lord is so good. I am so glad that my story could give you a bit of encouragement today.
Your family is one of the most amazing families I have ever heard of. What a testimony to the miraculous healing power of God. When I think of how long you waited for parents and how long your parents waited to become parents, and the bond you developed despite all the years apart, it is so incredibly inspiring.
Thank you for the sweet words Claire! They mean the world. The Lord has been so good to us. I’m so glad His story could encourage you. <3
Thankyou for sharing a little of your journey with us, it is so releasing when we come to that place before God & wiithin ourselves of our value & worth in Him.
Jennifer
Thanks for stopping by Jennifer! The Lord never stops growing us and I am so thankful for that. <3
What a story. Makes me shake my head in awe of God. So glad to read this today!
Thank you so much for taking a second to read Meg! The Lord is so faithful and I am forever grateful. <3
What a beautiful story! Thank you Lovelle.