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I became a full-time working mom last year…in real estate. I’ve become a sponge, soaking up every bit of knowledge I can.
It has been exciting, hard, and some days discouraging. This business is tough and so very far out of my comfort zone.
There have been moments I’ve said, I don’t want to do this anymore; it’s too hard…too much.
I’ve had this verse from James rolling around in my head, James 1:2-4: “Dear brothers and sisters, when troubles of any kind come your way, consider it an opportunity for great joy. For you know that when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow. So let it grow, for when your endurance is fully developed, you will be perfect and complete, needing nothing.” (What doesn’t kill me makes me stronger, right?!)
James reminds me each challenge is an opportunity to grow, develop, and persevere.
I won’t give up or give into fear…but you know, it would be super easy to do just that.
As I was thinking of what I would like to share with you today, I remembered how the past six months have tested my endurance. I’ve had days when other agents who began their realtoring (that’s a word in the Real Estate world 😉 ) the same time I did would get leads that actually led somewhere. I would force myself to be happy for them but inside, feel the sting of jealousy and wonder when it would be my turn.
And while it did eventually become my turn I thought, you know, I need to share what it takes to get disheartened and give up on your dreams and I think I’ve really narrowed it down…I came up with four practical ways.
What are my four ways?
1.Sit around and do nothing. I get it. Go ahead, give up. Give into the voice in your head that says, you’re not smart enough, talented enough…whatever the lie is, give into it. Let it win, the pull is strong, who cares anyways?! You tried, gave it your best and it wasn’t good enough. Wallow in your self-pity and let it overtake you.
And then, wipe the chocolate from your mouth, comb the rat-nest out of your hair and TRY AGAIN. Dreamers, winners, champions get knocked down so many times they have bruises on their hearts and knees. But, they get back up, brush the grit from their scrapes and do it again.
2. DO NOT PRAY. For heaven’s sake, if you want to get nowhere fast, decide praying is a waste of your time and energy. Believe those heart-felt cries and pleas are a vapor disappearing into thin air. I’m sure God has more important things to do than worry about your dreams.
“For the Lord your God is living among you. He is a mighty savior. He will take delight in you with gladness. With his love, he will calm all your fears. He will rejoice over you with joyful songs.” Zephaniah 3:17
He looks on us with love and even singing! Pray…and then pray some more!
3. Always, always, always, compare yourself to others. I recently asked this question in our private FB group…What keeps you from fully living? A fellow dreamer said this: “Comparing my journey to others and then not worrying that I’m not ‘keeping up.’ I’m fully alive when I rest in who he created me to be and the unique path He has me on.”
Want an infallible way to kill a dream before it’s even begun? Go ahead and compare your talents, your personality, your ability, etc. to those around you. Let’s see how far you get. Then come back and sit before God and let Him silence the not enough’s. He wants to reassure you, affirm you, and bless you, so let Him!
4. Do life alone and stay isolated. If you know me at all, you know I’m an introvert. I don’t mind being alone most of the time, but sometimes I enjoy it too much and I forget there’s a big ol’ world out there with lots of people who care about me.
Isolation will lead you to feeling like you are the only one. The only one struggling and having problems. The only one doubting God’s goodness and promises. (The only with a crazy family and kids who behave like zoo animals.)
You are not the only one!
Right here in this space, we understand that dreaming is a group effort. It takes a tribe. No man is an island. We are your people, your fellow dreamers, out-of-the-box thinkers.
Together we are unstoppable.
Your turn: What would you add to this list? Join me in the comments for a chance to win a copy of Holley Gerth’s book, You’re Made for a God-sized Dream.
Shared by: Alecia Simersky
P.S. Interested in joining our PRIVATE Facebook group? Friend me on Facebook, and I will add you. 🙂
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Joanne Viola says
Alecia, you raise such a good point – sometimes we sabotage our own dreams. May this give many the motivation to dust themselves off and get back up again! Wonderful giveaway as Holley’s book brings encouragement and the reminder God has created each of us for His purposes.
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Alecia says
I know my thoughts-you know the self-doubting ones-are always trying to sabotage my plans. I think if we could catch even a glimpse of the power we are capable of, we would truly live fearless! Thanks for being here, Joanne 🙂
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Michele Morin says
In community, we realize that we are not the only one who sometimes feels like a failure or who is tempted to quit. We realize that God is at work, and we find people who will pray with us through our low times — as we also pray for them when they are struggling.
Alecia, your four points are so insightful. Thanks for pointing out the ways we sabotage our dreams.
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nylseesahc says
I like the way Michele expresses her feedback to your post; your 4 points are indeed insightful.
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Alecia says
Exactly, Michele! Amen.
I like her response too, nylseesahc 🙂
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Bev @ Walking Well With God says
Alecia,
I needed your post today. I’ve been sidelined for 6 weeks from surgery and was hoping for a good report yesterday that I could soon be up and driving. That was not to be. Two more weeks and then re-evaluate. Not the report I wanted. I’m climbing the walls, but your post encouraged me to dig deeper and keep persevering. I wanted to do all the things not to do, but realize they don’t get you anywhere….thank you.
Blessings,
Bev
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Alecia says
I’m sorry about your surgery and being out of commission! Hang in there Bev, the days seem long, but soon they will be nothing but a distant memory 🙂
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Valerie Sisco at Grace with Silk says
Hi Alecia,
So glad to read words from you again! I loved what you said about challenges being opportunities to stretch our endurance muscles. It’s especially true when we take on a new job, as you have, or are challenged by something uncomfortable. Thanks for sharing these encouraging words with us! (I bet you get to look at some exciting homes and check out the decor, though!) 🙂
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Alecia says
Hey Valerie!! I’ve missed you!! I’ve enjoyed your pictures of your latest travels to Italy on Instagram…I feel like I got to go too! 🙂
And, yes, I do get to look at some amazingly beautiful homes and their decor. I get tons of ideas and inspiration 🙂
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Bethany Mcllrath says
Alecia, thanks for hosting this giveaway and sharing this humorous list! Spot on : ) I would add “blame everything/one else for being stuck.” I say it because somedays I get rotten and guilty of charging circumstances for discontent. God clearly teaches otherwise in the Bible!!
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Alecia says
Yes! The blame game…it’s easy to blame our circumstances on not being able to do what we think we should be doing. Being content in every season is tough…thanks for adding to the list! 🙂
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Kathy Cheek, Devotions from the Heart says
Since you asked what would we add to the list of things not to do, I would add, “Don’t ask for help.”
I learned earlier this year that asking for help is actually bold, and had a wonderful response.
I love the comment above, blame everyone else! 🙂
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Alecia says
Ha! Wouldn’t it be nice it we could blame everyone else?! 🙂
Oh yes, asking for help…now that’s a hard one. Do you think it’s especially hard for women because we are used to being the dependable ones? I’m afraid sometimes it shows my weakness so I try to do it all myself. But it’s so nice and freeing, not to mention a blessing for others to be able to help us, when we do ask. Thanks for this!
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Angela says
I would add listening to negative voices. I’ve been playing the “woe is me” reel recently until I decided to listen to an encouraging podcast and realized that I’ve been down because I’ve been listening to the wrong voices. We need to discern which voices we listen to. Some are outright negative and kill our dreams. Some are well-meaning, but don’t understand our dreams. Some speak directly into our dreams, encouraging us to keep going.
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Alecia says
AMEN!!! Those negative voices are like annoying barking chihuahua’s! And, come to think of it, I think that is exactly the analogy Holley uses in her book to describe them! 🙂 Thanks, Angela!
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Vicki Cottingham says
Thank you for the encouragement to persevere. I needed that.
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Alecia Simersky says
Congratulations, Vicki! I randomly chose you as the winner of Holley’s book, You’re Made for a God-sized Dream! I’ll email you for your info.
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Lori Van valkenburg says
Alecia, thanks for sharing this. I’ve been going thru a lot lately. You are so wise. Keep writing. God has given you a talent that helps others in their lives.
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