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When You’re Afraid Your God-sized Dream is too Much Like Hers

October 15, 2014 By Elise Daly Parker 7 Comments

When You're Afraid Your Dream is to Much Like Hers[pinit count=”horizontal”]

Do you ever wonder, “Why should I bother trying to realize my God-sized Dream?”

After all…

Elaine has an established platform.

Jennifer has money to spend on her dream.

Catie has connections that swing doors wide open.

And, Susie? Well, she can afford to hire a babysitter…so she can dedicate more time to move her dream forward.

Oh my…this pit of comparison, it’s deep. And it can be really hard to climb up on out of it. (<====Tweet This)

I know…I’ve been there.

I’ve gotten stuck down there in the muck and the mire of lies. I’ve taken my eyes off my dream and placed them squarely on the dream progress of others. And you know what happens then?

  • I can get jealous, coveting what another has.
  • I can get entitled, believing I deserve something someone else got.
  • I can get resentful, not really wishing other dreamers well.
  • I can get UGLY!

And what I can’t get is any closer to my dream. Because my mind, energy, efforts are being used up by anxious, bitter, envious thoughts.

So what’s a dreaming girl– who’s gotten off track and trapped in a rut of comparison– to do?

We’ve got to regroup. We’ve got to take action against our wrong thinking. And we’ve got to get a little help from our friend The Lord!

Step 1 – Admit Your Comparative Ways – Are you guilty of casting your eyes upon someone else’s dream? It’s okay…we’re only human. But we can’t stop a destructive pattern of thinking if we don’t face up to it. So let’s just take a moment here.

Lord, am I wanting what you’ve given to someone else? Am I coveting my neighbor’s dream? Please show me, Lord!

Step 2 – Confess Your Comparisons – God made only one me…only one you. He tells us we are fearfully and wonderfully made. He tells us not to covet. He tells us to love one another. He tells us to have a pure heart. And when we compare, we often neglect our own gifts, even worse, we can toss them aside, as though they’re not good enough.

Lord, I’m sorry I want what Jane has. Can you show me how you’ve made me? Remind me of the gifts you’ve given me…the dreams you’ve place in my heart? I’m sorry I’ve looked at my gifts as not good enough.

Step 3 – Be Mindful Going Forward – We can slide into the comparison trap without even realizing it. Maybe we’re tired…or weary…or frustrated with how our dream is going or not going. And our thoughts start to wander and we find ourselves wishing, hoping, daydreaming that our situation was different…more like hers. This is a temptation that God can give us victory over.

Oh Lord, please help me to be aware when my thoughts start to go there…When I wish things were different. Help me to keep a record of my dreams, how you made me, the progress and dream fulfillment you’ve allowed in my life.

Step 4 – Take One Step Forward on Your Dream Path – Think about what you really can do to move forward on your dream. One small step at a time. What can you do today? Do it!

Oh Lord, your desire is that I would prosper. You are my Dream Giver. Help me to trust that I am in your care. And show me Lord, what can I do today to fulfill the dream you’ve planted?

What small step toward your dream can you take today? (<====Tweet This)

Share in the comments so we can cheer each other on!!

Shared by: Elise Daly Parker

Photo Credit: Unsplash

Related

Filed Under: Fears Tossing Your Dream, The Ups and Downs of Dreaming

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Elise Daly Parker

About Elise Daly Parker

Elise’s latest dream set sail with the launch of her community site, Circles of Faith, Where Faith, Life, and Community Intersect. Through Circles, Elise lives out her passion for sharing stories that inspire, equip, and connect. She believes everyone has a story that matters, that God forms our dreams, and He will make them come true! Anchored in writing and editing for over 30 years, Elise is a freelance writer and editor, speaker, writing coach, and MOPS Mentor Mom. She is newly navigating life at home without kids and with a wonderful husband. Her future itinerary includes a grandbaby. She looks forward to dropping anchor here and getting to know you! Elise blogs at Our Stories, God's Glory and can be found on Facebook and Twitter.

Comments

  1. CrystalCrystal says

    October 15, 2014 at 10:07 am

    What perfect timing for this post – I always struggle with this more when I’m getting ready to head to a conference where I’ll be surrounded by world changers and much more successful/popular bloggers. I know my head will hear all kinds of tips on how to grow my platform, but my heart just wants to connect more deeply with other women – and sometimes those conversations leave me doubting where God has me. Thank you for this encouragement today, and for the practical tips to work through it!

    Reply
    • AvatarElise Daly Parker says

      October 15, 2014 at 7:40 pm

      Thank you Crystal for taking the time to chat. And oh yes, our enemy works overtime when we’re going to a conference where we can be built up and empowered…Oh no, he wants none of that. I appreciate your honesty…and just so you know, to me you’re a big blogger with a lot of clout. I know that’s not the point, but I guess a lot of this has to do with perspective. I have definitely been feeling insecure as I too head to that same conference. See you there!

      Reply
  2. TiffanyTiffany says

    October 15, 2014 at 10:56 am

    Such wise council, Elise. Comparisons can become like idols in our heart…we fix our eyes on others instead of the One who has the power to use and transform us. Such a timely reminder. Thank you for sharing the practical and the spiritual.

    Reply
    • AvatarElise Daly Parker says

      October 15, 2014 at 7:42 pm

      So true Tiffany! I didn’t think of comparison as an idol, but I guess anything that grips us and blocks us from the One true God can become an idol. Thanks for your wise words here. Love how we can learn from one another.

      Reply
  3. Avatarlisha epperson says

    October 15, 2014 at 8:32 pm

    I love thjs Elise. As we head ito conference season I’m thinking about all I’ll miss. And foolishly, I compare my not attending to all the women who get to go this year. And everything I’ll miss. Your post reminds me Gods plans are unique for each of His daughters. I think I’ll go have a cup of tea and chill out now. Thank you for this timely word. Such good stuff.

    Reply
    • AvatarElise Daly Parker says

      October 16, 2014 at 5:11 pm

      Thanks Lisha…I hear you. I wish I could meet you at an upcoming conference. And I know what you mean. I hear about other conferences and I think I’m out of the loop and compare myself to those who seem to be in it. But here’s good news…you are a neighbor. So let’s have our own conference!!

      Reply
  4. AvatarBetsy says

    November 8, 2014 at 11:33 am

    Elise, thanks for sharing so openly about something that many of us feel but never admit! I’d just had some feelings like that this week when I see some of my friends’ blogs. I especially like your point about how comparison makes us neglect our own gifts. So good. One thing that I’m going to do today is work a bit on a post I’m trying to finish up and submit to a blog for guest posting!

    Reply

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