Wild In The Hollow: Chapters 13-15

October 15, 2015 By Alecia Simersky 2 Comments

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www.amberhaines.com

Hello! Welcome back. Today we are going to cover chapters 13-15. So grab a cup of coffee or tea and let’s dig in!

Chapter 13: See Through

Oh, I love this chapter! Amber asks God for the gift of prophecy, which is a spiritual gift we really don’t hear much about. She asked for eyes to see a deeper meaning in the world around her. I think her trip to Haiti did just that. Didn’t you just love how she described all she witnessed there?

It was all broken, but there was art at every turn. Even in the thickest poverty, there was a man humming. There was the smell of spice. The faces were so beautiful it made me schoolgirl nervous.” (pg.151)

While in Haiti we get to read about the vision of the church God gave Amber.

We were clothed with the same Spirit, all of us…The beautiful church. I saw with my eyes the benefits of churches coming alongside other churches, acknowledging the whole. I saw with my eyes unity, I held the fatherless, and they were there the future of us all. I saw them, and it made me long for my North American church. I longed for us to be one. I went to Haiti for a vision, to fall in love with my own people. There was no us and them. There is only us.” (pg. 153)

In the midst of such poverty she witnessed great hope. She saw people who should be angry and feel hopeless but instead were filled with spirit-joy and servant’s hearts.

We see the shift in Amber and she recognizes how close the kingdom of God is, how if we open our eyes we will truly see like the Haitians do, like she does– we all play a part in kingdom work.

My biggest take-away is that if we each play a part there is no reason to be jealous of each other. I need to always keep a spiritual perspective of my role here on earth. (<====Click to Tweet)

Chapter 14: Hope of the Exiled

This chapter builds on 13, and it gets even better. I loved her conversation with St. Cyr at the Haitian version of Hooters :). He perfectly explains that leaders are mere servants, to be rich means to be rich in faith-not money, and as long as people seek to make a name for himself they will be dissatisfied-in life and with the church.

I went back and read page 166 a couple of times. I wanted the words of St. Cyr to really sink into my mind and heart. “American culture never allows you to be satisfied,” he said. So true.

Sometimes I wonder what other cultures think of us. Especially those like Haiti. Do they think us like a child? Always wanting more, more, more.

The trip for Amber was like waking up from a drug-induced coma. She saw the world, her world, clearly for the first time.

We are over-spent, lonely, and dissatisfied with each other and the church and we don’t know why or how to fix it.(<====Click to Tweet)

Chapter 15: Whole in Sick Places

I’ve always wanted to go to Italy. It was nice to experience it through Amber’s words.

I like the idea of using our gifts to bring healing and wholeness to our community.

When we seek the kingdom of God and our desires point to him, we will live in joy. Isolation is the antithesis of wholeness. We were born for community.

The desires of this world will NEVER be enough. The latest fashions, newest cars, most decadent treats aren’t meant to fill the void of God. We are weak, He makes us strong. We are sick, He makes us well. We will always be homesick this side of heaven.

How we live here and now, how we love and bring the kingdom of God to earth is important.

He {Jesus} bucked social trends to heal, to bring completeness. He healed a crippled woman on the Sabbath. He told her to get up and walk. That is the very Spirit who makes us. Do we believe him? Do we believe that the Spirit’s embodying brings completeness? Do we know that completeness isn’t an organization, conference, or program that serves up “church” to be consumed like a business serves up a product?” (pg. 188)

Now is our time friends, we are the church. It’s time for us to rise up. If we want the church to be more like Jesus, it starts with us. (<====Click To Tweet)

Questions:

We don’t need to travel to Haiti to see brokenness, it’s all around us. But are you able to be spirit and joy-filled in the midst of hardships?

How do you maintain your joy in the midst of trials?

We ALL have a part in kingdom work. Do you recognize your gifts?

What are some ways we can live lives of greater impact for the kingdom of God?

Jesus was a world-changer. He lived and loved so differently from the people of His time. I want that too. How about you?

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We have ONE more chapter! I can’t believe how fast the time has gone by. Thank you for meeting me here each week as we dived into our first book club!! Join me next week as we cover the last chapter and wrap it up with a video! 🙂 I figured we started with a video it was only right to end with one as well. Join me in the comments below and let me know your thoughts on these chapters. There was so much good stuff I wanted to cover I wished we were sitting across from each other. If you have trouble leaving a comment below, please join us over on Facebook!

Shared by: Alecia Simersky

Wild In The Hollow: Chapters 10-12

October 8, 2015 By Alecia Simersky 7 Comments

Welcome to the Wild in the Hollow book club! Today we are going to cover chapters 10-12.

Chapter 10: Sustain

More and more, younger ones joined us to sing and know the joy of Christian community. Even some who didn’t believe, or didn’t want to be associated with Christians, came to be a part of it.”

In chapter 10 we read about the homemade community Amber and Seth unintentionally created. She shares of the beautiful gift of serving and being served and how it all happened organically. Nothing rigged, no barriers allowed. One minute they could be celebrating a birthday and the next a baptism. What a beautiful picture of family, of kingdom come.

After moving from the apartment building and back into the Rock House, we soon get to meet baby Titus. The fourth boy of the Haines’ family.

Titus gets sick and then sicker and there is no medical reason why. And we get to see community once again in all it’s glory as it rallies around Amber and Seth, sustaining them in their time of need.

Chapter 11: Muscle Memory

When a loved one is sick we give them our all. But soon though, we have to take time for ourselves. In those moments we steal away it’s good to be vulnerable and admit how hard life has been. Let the tears flow. Rest in the peace of God.

The words on page 122 really got me: “I don’t want to break. I don’t want to break. After telling a friend about my weariness, she said, “Maybe that’s exactly what you’re supposed to do-let yourself break.”

How often have I gone through a trial and had to tell myself, be strong, be strong!

We don’t want to break, we don’t want the “what-if’s” of life to be a reality. Can we handle them? Can we still hold onto faith if the thing we dread the most happens? Will we still believe God is good?

These are all real questions that at some point in our lives we will come face to face with. We can move away from God and shake our fists at Him or lean into Him and trust.

Our trials will refine us. We will be able to look back on them and say because my “what-if” happened I trust God more than ever!

Once you’ve walked through the fire with God you will never be the same. (<====Click to Tweet)

Chapter 12: Seed of Desire

This is what I know of desire. Desire affects the whole person, mind, body, and soul. Desire is a drive. It is a hunger that opens its mouth. It is dissatisfaction, a longing, a wintered beast of prey. It is the hand of Potiphar’s wife for Joseph’s coat. It is the madness for the harp of David.”

When we lose hope we lose our way. This is what Amber discovers after months and months of Titus being sick. They had to back out of community because their souls were tired and in despair. They didn’t know how to do anything else but put one foot in front of the other.

This season they were in was draining.

We all have these season where it seems as if life just throws one thing after another at us. And we slip into survival mode without even realizing it.

We cut ourselves off from God, the church, even community because we are trying to get through the day not needing anyone, and yet not realizing how broken we have become.

As we see from Amber and Seth, they were broken and walking around in pieces of themselves. Instead of trusting in their community and God they sought refuge in alcohol, shopping, a new home.

Any time we seek refuge in anything other than God the fruits of our lives will tell on us.

Amber had her embers reignited by someone reminding her who lives in her…the Holy Spirit. This was her wake up call.

She realized she had gifts given to her! She believed it for others but never once for herself. It’s almost as if we, the readers, can see the stars align in her life. All the mistakes, the doubts, the fears, they were because Amber never believed God had good plans for her and desired her!

How our lives are changed when we believe God loves us, accepts us, and wants good things for our lives!

Questions:

We all long for community. Has community come easy to you?

What are some ways you build community?

How have trials made you into the person you are today? Would you say your faith is stronger or weaker?

Have you ever found yourself in survival mode? How did you break free from it?

Do you believe God has good plans for your life?

Shared by: Alecia Simersky

Wild In The Hollow, Chapters 7-9

October 1, 2015 By Alecia Simersky Leave a Comment

Only in exhaustion would I bow low in prayer, always hiding parts away because I couldn’t let them go. I was always aware that this was my second baby and that I could have torn this family apart with an affair.”

Chapter 7: Thirsty

Seth and Amber gave birth to a healthy baby boy, but as she says, “to love.” However, Amber’s secret is eating her alive. After baby Isaac was born she endured two miscarriages back to back. On page 79 she writes, “I had hoped that I would take rest in God during another heartbreak, but only when the breaking happens can anybody really know.”

I want to park on those words a minute. I want to believe that in good times and bad I will have unwavering faith to hold onto God. Early on my spiritual journey I behaved as a spoiled child when things didn’t go my way. Now, many years later with numerous trials under my belt I see them as the refining tool they are. I don’t enjoy them, but going through the fire with God has brought wisdom I wouldn’t trade for anything.

What about you? Do you find it hard to hold onto your faith when you are enduring trials?

Chapter 8: Secret Hiding Place

There was a parking spot behind a tiny church off Simpson Point Road that hid me. I’ve hidden poetry, drugs, theology, music, and men. The hiding place is always the secret.“

In chapter eight we find the Haines’ home with three babies in three years. Just the thought makes me want to lay down and sleep!

Is there anything more refining than children? “We could feel ourselves being changed by the minute, and change was exactly what we wanted. We always said we wanted to be different, kind, world-changing lives but when it came down to it, we had been everything but different with our big house and fine job and cute dog.”

After reading these lines I had to put in my bookmark and think a spell. I wanted this for my family too, to be different. But as I looked around at my nice home, fine job, cute dogs I knew I wasn’t living what I wanted. How do we make the change from comfortable to different? I’m still asking myself this question…

Slowly life seems to be overtaking Amber. The day-to-day can be overwhelming. She was drowning in sameness…and the lie of her affair was demanding to be dealt with.

The confession, repentance and grace from Seth that followed was a beautiful, hard thing to read.

Have you ever had to confess and repent from a mistake? Were you met with the grace Seth showed Amber?

Chapter 9: Doula

A Doula is by definition: “A woman whose job is to give advice and comfort to a woman who is giving birth.”

By being at the bedside of her MawMaw as she left this earth and birthed her new body in Heaven, through being at the side of her best friends giving birth to their children we see how Amber is a Doula. But she’s also a doula in other ways…in community.

This chapter is about living small, different, and allowing community to heal you. We can feel the heartbreak among Amber’s words. She is grieving for a daughter she never held, her friends are grieving over lost dreams and it seemed as if God kept bringing more people into their lives that needed the healing touch of community.

A community of broken believers is being born.

There’s also something else I want to point out, the desire for smallness. What does this mean to you?

Like Amber, for me it meant scarcity. It meant I believed good things for others, but not myself. I twisted the idea of smallness. In 1 Thessalonians 4:11 it says, “…Make it your ambition to lead a quiet life and attend to your own business and work with your hands, just as we commanded you.”

I see now smallness is living out God’s plan for my life. Believing for good things, even hoping for them. Not being scared if my dreams come true. And from the overflow? Being a bigger blessing to those around me.

Questions:
Have you ever had a secret that burdened you so you had no choice but to confess? Describe the feeling after your confession.

How do we make the change from comfortable to different?

What does living small mean to you?

Please share your thoughts in the comments and if you have any problems leaving them here join us over on FB! Do you blog and have written a post on this book? We’d love for you to share the link in the comments!

Shared by: Alecia Simersky

Wild In The Hollow: Chapters 4-6

September 24, 2015 By Alecia Simersky 8 Comments

Today we will discuss chapters 4-6. There is so much good material here. Let’s get started!

Chapter 4: Harness on the Wind

She (Mamaw) didn’t mean to teach me that Jesus was one who worked in scraps or one who took on strays, but she did. She taught me what the church is supposed to look like. She took care of what she had. She gave part of it away…It wasn’t her job to make the world beautiful. All she did was feed us and give us a place to rest.”

In this chapter we see Amber as not only a new believer on fire for the Lord, but also a newlywed about to attend her first mega-church where her husband served as youth pastor. I had a feeling things were about to get very interesting :).

As a new believer how did you reconcile who God made you to be, the Holy Spirit’s leadings, and the church’s doctrines? Was this a struggle? Do you feel they can all be in unity?

My favorite lines from this chapter that resonated the most with me are right here:

I made a mistake when I came into the church. I walked in newly transformed, with a diamond on my finger, and asked them, “Will you love me now?” If I change the way I dress, calm down some, use your language, and learn to defend the faith well, if I accept the parades of the church and all the fancy fireworks, will you love me then?”(pg.50)

We so desperately want people to love and accept us. We want others to see we are changed after we become christians. But sometimes I think instead of trying to please God we twist it into trying to please His people instead.

We can’t look to the church to be our Holy Spirit.

Only the Holy Spirit can be the Holy Spirit.

What do you think?

Chapter 5: Hungry

So, in my new faith, rather than give in to desire, fall into sin, and die, I decided to kill off desire instead. This is what I thought church was for. I lay down before her-the church-like I had on the dorm room floor. I waited for passions to die. I waited to feel alive.”

Wow.

In her beautiful spin of words that leave you dizzy and amazed someone actually writes like this, we are reminded we are responsible for our own spiritual journeys. The church is a wonderful place to be, but she is wholly imperfect.

We can’t put our hope in her, because we will only be left disappointed.

We can try-hard holy and will end up putting ourselves in spiritual starvation mode for something real…more. OR we can give into the easy grace and yoke of God. He doesn’t ask us to burden ourselves in trying to be good enough for anyone or anything. He didn’t intend for His church to become a burden, He meant it to be a blessing.

I think for me the question I am asking myself is,”How can I be a blessing in the church and not burden others with religion?”

Chapter 6: A Wolf Revision

I began to revise my future, as if the rewriting would make it better… I saw myself in the past, in love, and I told her, “Revisions of love are perversions. You cannot revise the future for improvements. It is already beautiful-a garden planted, watered, pruned, and bearing fruit.”

This chapter hit me hard and left me looking deep within. Does she not know how to spin a tale of words?!

At some point those of us who are married will go through a spell where we are left wondering, Did we make a mistake? Why aren’t we happy anymore?

Amber had an affair to make her feel alive, loved. She took her eyes off not only her first love, God, but Seth and the life they had created together…for better or worse. New life is forming inside her, and with it I think we are going to see a rebirthing of Amber too.

Conclusion & Questions

What are your thoughts?

Have you ever felt that the church complicates the gospel?

Have you ever found yourself in a cycle of pleasing men rather than God?

Shared by: Alecia Simersky

Wild In The Hollow: Chapters 1-3

September 17, 2015 By Alecia Simersky 2 Comments

Today we will cover chapters one through three: Rebel, Capacity:One, and Becoming Kin. We have a lot of ground to cover, shall we dig in?

“I thought I would never be able to do enough to be accepted by God’s people, and therefore by God. I lived outside the umbrella, and I knew it.” (pg. 18)

How many of us grew up striving to please God and His people?

Striving will eventually burn us out and for some make us feel resentful.

Early in life Amber realized shame was a good motivator for giving up any facade of being good enough in the church. She spent many years trying to fill the “hollow places.” There is a God-sized hole in our hearts that can only be filled with Him. Not sex, drugs, or even rock n’ roll.

I know for me I could relate to this chapter, because even though I always believed in God and Jesus, I didn’t know how to have a personal relationship with him or what that even meant for so long.

In my search for love and filling the hollow places in my own soul I filled it with boys. I wanted their attention and love I thought if I had it then I was accepted and good enough. I didn’t want to be alone.

Did you notice the resounding theme in chapter 1? Freedom. Oh, the things we will do in the name of freedom. From her life examples we see Amber was promiscuous, used drugs & alcohol, ran with the wild kids all in the name of freedom. And in doing so heaped up a load of guilt. Guilt that followed her around like a “darling pet.”

When we cannot accept God’s grace and live outside His boundaries for our lives, guilt will always be our shadow. The wrong kind of freedom-chasing will eventually exhaust us and leave us burdened down with guilt and shame.

Have you found this true in your own life?

*************************************

Chapter 2: Capacity: One

“I believed that all God saw in me were the claws of shame. There was no getting them out.”

I remember being a young girl wanting nothing more than to be loved, free, independent. I wanted to experience all of life and not have any regrets, just like they promote in the movies and tv shows. Only what they don’t tell show you is the shame and guilt that follows when you live wild and free. They don’t show the emotional consequences that follow. Somewhere along the way you start to feel dirty and not enough. Why on earth would God love us? Want us? Care about us? He only wants the good-ones. Not us.

But he does. He does want us. He does love us and He does want to use our lives for His good purposes.

Amber says even in her rebellious days she remembers a distinct haunting from the Lord. I remember feeling this way too as a teenager. I would sit in church and be moved emotionally to tears. I felt like God was calling me to something more,but I didn’t how to accept what He was offering.

When Amber was at her lowest and wanted to die, she gave God an ultimatum. (Haven’t we all?)

To me, the last few paragraphs on page 30 are some of the most powerful words in the entire book.

What do you think?

They are of her telling God she is ready to die. And there on the linoleum floor of her dorm bathroom, God met her there and breathed His God-breath into her. For the first time in her life, Amber was fully alive and free.

***********************************

Chapter 3: Becoming Kin

“There will always be ways I’m learning to let God love me, but maybe I inherited more than desire for the knowledge of good and evil from our Eve. Maybe I inherited her memory, the echoes of the garden.”

What stood out to me in this chapter the most is the feeling Amber describes after being saved. The feeling for the first time of being claimed, named and seeing in her mind God smiling on her. I think this is a feeling we all long for. Being known and seen by God. By El Roi the God who sees us.

It’s like God opened her eyes and she was seeing for the first time all the ways He had always loved her since she was a little girl.

“I didn’t have the language for it then, but I saw the Imago Dei everywhere and in everyone. I saw myself as a child of God, Abba letting me come to him, boldly and with ease, in the gentleness of relationship. I was confident, and I saw God as one who loved me completely as a good Father. And Jesus–he, my love, my brother–became my friend. He was becoming the only place that made sense to me, the only way to see the world.” (pg.36)

After her transformation on the linoleum floor, Amber began her journey with Christ. With fresh eyes and a clean heart she also began her journey to fitting in with other christians…

Questions:

What was your first perception of the church when you started attending?

If it was negative did it push you away?

What brought you back to the church?

How do you reconcile grace and the church?

How has God met you in your lowest point?

What parts of these chapters stood out to you? What are your thoughts on them?

Please share your insights in the comments. I’m looking forward to fleshing out this book with you!

Shared by: Alecia Simersky

Wild In The Hollow, Introduction

September 10, 2015 By Alecia Simersky 4 Comments

Welcome! I’m so glad you made it for the kick off of our very first book club.

Please watch the video which introduces the book and let me know in the comments if you are as excited about reading this book as much as I am!

God-sized Dreams Book Club! from Alecia on Vimeo.

We will cover three chapters at a time and meet back every Thursday to discuss what we’ve read.

Share with a friend, come one come all. We are happy you are here.

Shared by: Alecia Simersky

Wild in the Hollow, Book Club & Giveaway

August 20, 2015 By Alecia Simersky 9 Comments

We are elated to announce we are forming a book club!!

I’m excited about forming our own little space to read and come together once a week to discuss ALL the things. For this book lover a book club is better than Disney World!

We will be reading Wild in the Hollow, by Amber Haines. It’s a newly released book that I had the opportunity to review and absolutely fell in love with. I think you are going to love it too!

Wild in the Hollow is Amber’s story of searching for freedom, love, and acceptance in all the wrong places. But yet Jesus met her on a linoleum floor of the bathroom in her college dorm.

The reason I chose this book other than my obvious love for the book is I realized out of our darkest trials come our testimonies… and usually our dreams.

We each have a story.

Instead of letting our past trials make us bitter we can allow them to make us better. I hope this book encourages you as much as it did me about using my past to help others who may be stuck or feeling ashamed.

And if you don’t have a past you are ashamed about, I still think you will be able to relate to a lot of Amber’s spiritual journey.

*************

Every Thursday I will put up a short post of my thoughts on the chapter we’ve just read with some discussion questions. I’d love for you to read along and join me in the comments with your own thoughts and questions.

All you need to do right now is get the book, you can go to your local bookstore, DaySpring, or Amazon.

One lucky reader is going to get a chance to win a copy of Wild in the Hollow, which Amber has so graciously agreed to give away to one of our readers. Thank you, Amber!

We will kick off with an introductory post Thursday, September 10th.

Leave us a comment below and tell us if you plan to join in! We will use Random.org to randomly choose a winner from the comments. Winner will be announced Monday, August 24th.

Shared by: Alecia Simersky

Picture #1: BossFight
Picture #2: Amber Haines

You’re Loved No Matter What – A Book Club!

March 3, 2015 By Kristin Hill Taylor 25 Comments

Holley Gerth shared about the message of her new book about a year ago as I sat at a table with her some other God-sized dreamers. I remember nodding in agreement that this message needed to be shared. I knew then and still know that laying down perfection at the cross is a necessary message because it’s one my soul needs.

I’ve been journeying away from perfection and toward grace and joy. The process has been like leaving the darkness and walking into the light. What’s been so hard about it all is letting God reshape my natural tendencies and change my expectations. What’s been really encouraging about the whole process is how God intertwines so many books, friendships, conversations, blog posts, songs, and moments to teach me.

I am loved no matter what. There’s nothing I can do to change what Jesus already did for me.

That’s the message Holley shares in her newest book, “You’re Loved No Matter What: Freeing Your Heart from the Need to be Perfect.”

I read the first few chapters in one sitting recently and felt like she was writing for me. But I know I’m not alone in needing this message. It’s the kind of practical wisdom that would thrive in discussion with other women. We can share our struggles and the ways God has redeemed them.

So beginning March 16, I’m going to host an online book study of “You’re Loved No Matter What.” The book officially releases today!

We’ll take the book a chapter at a time as I post discussion questions each Monday. It’ll be a private Facebook group so what you say there is safe within the group. You can join the conversations as your week allows.

While I hope those who commit are invested in sharing and encouraging, I can promise you there will be grace. I believe this book will prompt conversations we as women need to have – with God, with ourselves, and with each other.

Who’s in? Please comment here with your email address and Facebook name (if we aren’t already friends there and you doubt I have your email address) or email me so I can keep you informed and get you added to our group. Meanwhile, please make arrangements to get the book and read the introduction and first chapter by March 16.

Shared By: Kristin Hill Taylor

For the Love of Reading

January 31, 2015 By GodSizedDreamers 1 Comment

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Friends,

We are excited to share something new with all of you. While at Allume we had the opportunity to not only hear from some amazing speakers/writers, we also were overwhelmed with books, books and more books.

Delonna started dreaming about having a book club here at God-sized Dreams. We have several books in mind that we would love to explore with you. But in all honesty, the logistics of pulling that all together, the hows, whens etc., have not come together {yet}. We are hoping to have something here this summer but until then we want to encourage you to participate in a little Reading Cafe that is happening over at Joy Forney’s place.

Joy is keeping things simple (and oh how we like that right now) and just offering a book choice at the beginning of the month and asking people to join her in reading and then, if you are inclined, to link up your thoughts with her on February 26th!

Isn’t that fantastic?!

Her choice is Sara Hagerty’s book “Every Bitter Thing is Sweet“. Sara was one of the featured speakers at Allume and those that attended got a copy of her book. I have read a portion of it and it is wonderful. We know that this book will be an encouragement to you.

So, if you are interested, grab a copy of her book (it is only $2.80 on Kindle right now!!), get to reading and join Joy at her place at the end of the month for a link up of your thoughts.

As we get closer to the summer, and get everything in order, we will let you know when we will start our own “club” over here!

Read on! 🙂

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