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About Mandy Mianecki

Mandy Mianecki is a wife and mom of 4. The storms of life have taught her to put her nets out into the deep, seeking the superabundance that life in Christ promises. She is passionate about encouraging others in their healing journeys from brokenness to wholeness; in uncovering their unique kind of God-breathed brilliance; and in living in the freedom won by Christ. When she’s not writing, Mandy is still dreaming God-sized dreams, which usually involve making art, wearing turquoise, and eyeing a nearby jar of Nutella. She blogs at Hearts Undaunted or you can connect with her on Facebook and Twitter.

Keep Your Heart Open

February 19, 2018 By Mandy Mianecki 30 Comments

#godsizedreams

#godsizedreams

“If you have gone through hurts in this life and you have kept your heart open, then you are a remarkable person…You have made a choice that few do.”

–Holley Gerth, You’re Made for a God-sized Dream, Chapter 3

“He didn’t mean to kill Patty. He was shooting because he was afraid.” These astonishing words of forgiveness tumbled out of my friend’s mouth as we sat on the carpeted hallway floor outside of the chapel. She had just sat through a meeting on the logistics of heightened security and traffic flow needed for the funeral of her precious husband, killed in the line of duty.

Her voice was soft and calm. Undeniably sad and dazed, but certain. She spoke of the shooter’s family and the pain they must be enduring. In her time of deepest sorrow, my sweet friend kept her heart open.

She spent the subsequent days, weeks, months, even years, in unspeakable grief, a range of emotions I will never fully know; yet, she kept squeezing her babies tight…and each person she encountered. Yes, we know to expect that bear hug when she greets us.

My heart rejoices that her new husband now receives those bear hugs, and her his in return.

She kept her heart open.

***

There is a certain kind of destructive marriage…the kind that cries out for annulment, and my friend found herself in one. My friend with a bigger heart than just about anyone I know. A spirit so alive and adventurous. Children so precious. She—they—were being crushed. Resource after resource for improvement exhausted, laden with trauma most would not believe existed, she made a brave choice. She kept her heart open.

Knowing neither would heal together, and perhaps him ever, she fought for her kids and began a new, healthy life. She secured avenues of support, a home she made beautiful and safe for her babies, and an income to support them.

And then she completed certification as a yoga instructor.

She kept her heart open.

***

My brave friends are an example to me. They endured pain that few can understand, and they’ve continued on in ways that bring life to others. Rather than being bitter, they are better, and their light helps those around them to be better too. They kept their hearts open.

I’m focusing on keeping my heart open too. I’m writing from a place of personal upheaval as my family goes through many changes. I’m walking with my children as they learn to manage the stress and pain that comes with relationship changes that are beyond their control. Addresses are different. Income is different. We wonder why God allows what he allows.

And yet. Their spirits are sweet. Their precious personalities are blossoming as they journey with courage through some hard days.

We’re keeping our hearts open.

It’s hard to remember God is loving when the world feels like it’s collapsing. [clickToTweet tweet=”Allowing myself to be consumed by anger and bitterness would be easy. @MandyMianecki #keepyourheartopen” quote=”Allowing myself to be consumed by anger and bitterness would be easy.”] But, that still, small voice inside keeps niggling at me.

To keep my heart open.

Maybe you’ve been there? Maybe you’re there right now. Whatever you’re going through, will you continue to make the brave choice to keep your heart open? [clickToTweet tweet=”God-sized dreamers keep their hearts open. @MandyMianecki” quote=”That is the way of the God-sized dreamer.”]

 

“You are a light, my friend. Because when your heart is open, it’s Jesus who shines out. And that glow illuminates the path to dreams he’s given you.”

–Holly Gerth, You’re Made for a God-sized Dream, Chapter 3

Shared by: Mandy Mianecki

                          

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An InLinkz Link-up


Filed Under: You're Made for a God-Sized Dream Series

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Your Sweet Spot Matters

June 12, 2017 By Mandy Mianecki 16 Comments

Your Sweet Spot Matter

 

#godsizedreams

But let your ‘Yes’ be ‘Yes,’ and your ‘No,’ –Matthew 5:37

When the bright red bubble of happiness popped up on my Facebook notifications, I eagerly clicked. Join my event, it urged! Such and such for sale, come over for appetizers and shopping.

I immediately clicked “Can’t Go.” It wasn’t because it was sales. Being in business myself, I appreciate these kinds events. I’ve put on these kinds of events.

It was the thought of entering a home I’d never been to and mingling with people I didn’t know. [clickToTweet tweet=”I knew it wasn’t my comfort zone. Nope. Not going. #trustyourgut @MandyMianecki” quote=”I knew it wasn’t my comfort zone. Nope. Not going.”]

Until my classic overthinking kicked in: It would be nice to get out of the house, converse with other moms, and put responsibilities aside for a couple of hours. If nothing else, I could catch up with the few ladies I did know. Maybe I’d even enjoy meeting new people!

I went.

As I approached the front door, my nerves ramped up. Knock, or just enter? Introduce myself, or start browsing the products? My confidence plummeting, I entered and smiled weakly at a few ladies as I surveyed the room. Walking into the kitchen, I found the hostess and the the sales distributor, a friend.

She explained the layout of the products, and my head began to spin. All the ladies surrounded me seemed at ease and thrilled to shop. They were familiar with the products and eager to add to their stash.

This was not the picture I had in my head. One friend had come early and left before I got there. The others I knew were rightly engaged in hosting. I knew the small talk starters and other tricks to socializing, but it all made me want to run and hide. I knew how I functioned well, and this was not it.

***

What’s your week look like? I texted. Want to grab coffee?

I entered Panera excited to grab some comfort food and catch up with my friend.

Her ready smile and warm bear hug set a pleasant, inviting tone for the visit. She asked about my family, recent activities, known challenges, and I did the same for her. We laughed as we caught up on school woes, kids’ antics, and upcoming fun activities, and we brainstormed and sympathized with each other’s stresses and struggles.

I left feeling energized and uplifted.

Two events, two vastly different experiences… They are not parallel situations, but they confirmed something important for me.

I thrive in one on one situations that skip small talk. I know this about myself. There was a time when one on ones triggered anxiety in me too, but never so much as large groups.

At the first event, I was trying to thrive in a situation I knew was not in my strengths. Was there anything inherently wrong with going to the first event? Not at all! It wasn’t entirely unpleasant for me either. It was simply an exercise in not trusting my intuition, not honoring who I am, and caving to the “shoulds.” You know the ones:

  • I should be able to do this.
  • I should do the hard thing.
  • I should stretch myself.
  • I should be stronger.
  • I should be better.
  • I should be doing what everyone else is.
  • I should be there to support my friend.

Striving for personal growth is a good thing, but focusing too much attention on managing weaknesses keeps us out of the sweet spot of where God calls us to be and can lead to discouragement. [clickToTweet tweet=”God doesn’t call us to be a nervous wreck. @MandyMianecki #useyourstrengths” quote=”God doesn’t call us to be a nervous wreck.”]

He calls us to the freedom that is found in abundant life with Him. Living in that freedom means recognizing who He made us to be and spending most of our energy there. Our unique giftings, interests, and even some of our preferences can point us to our God-sized dreams, and we progress in those dreams when we live in the authenticity of how He made us.

It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery. –Galatians 5:1

What “shoulds” are holding you back?

Under what conditions do you thrive?

Shared by: Mandy Mianecki

                                           

dreamtogether-linkup

An InLinkz Link-up


Filed Under: Stories from Dreamers, The Ups and Downs of Dreaming

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Forty and Free!

January 30, 2017 By Mandy Mianecki 20 Comments

#godsizeddreams

#godsizeddreams

June 2016 initiated a countdown: the last 6 months of my thirties.

Though I generally default to anxiety, this milestone was different. Actual anticipation grew as the big day drew near.

I was eager to begin this new phase in my life.

In early marriage and motherhood, I lived in a strange tension of adult responsibilities but not yet “feeling” like an adult. Teaching kindergarten, owning and cleaning my first home, grocery shopping and cooking for my husband and myself…these were certainly grown-up activities.

Then the babies started coming. Hello, adulting. Still, it almost felt like a season of being outside of my own body. I executed all those tasks but still felt so young inside.

I soon came to understand that feeling as losing myself, not being comfortable in my own skin, and being unable to discern my unique purpose in life. Yes, I was a wife. Yes, I was a mom. But who was I? Who did God created me to be and do in this life?

I was living small, riddled with insecurity and brokenness. I didn’t dare have dreams and hadn’t even imagined such a thing as a God-sized dream.

Untangling from shackles like those is slow and sometimes turbulent. It was a constant search for healing, growth, and renewal that led to the anticipation of my 40th birthday. That yearning, struggling, and reaching expanded slowly into a wide open space of possibilities.

Of freedom.

And just being done.

Done with drama. Insecurity. Being shackled. Living small.

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Approaching 40 afforded me with an excellent reason to assess. I reflected on my marriage, my kids, my extended family, my friendships, and my businesses. I pondered what I want the next 10 years of my life to look like.

For the first time in a long time, I felt excited, hopeful, and confident.

This would be my time to embrace God’s love for me, who He created me to be, and what He’s called me to do.

No matter what anyone else thinks or says about it.

It was time to walk in freedom.

Click To Tweet

I gathered with some amazing friends, my daughters, added in some painting, wine (for the adults, of course!), music, cupcakes, and lots of laughs, and ushered in 40 with gusto!

Forty marks a turning point for me, a point of readiness. Yet, it’s taken the learning experiences all along the way to bring me to this place of readiness.

Maybe you’re on the journey to readiness. Are you anxious? Feeling stuck? Yearning for more? Then I want to encourage you! As long as you don’t want to stay there, you won’t. It doesn’t last forever. You are in a season that teaches you who you are and how God loves you.

Maybe you’re right where I am, ready and eager to see where your next God-sized dream takes you. I sense this will be a beautiful season of walking in freedom and long-sought confidence. Enjoy it! You’ll learn even more about who you are and how God loves you.

Maybe you’ve been walking in the rhythm of freedom for awhile now. Although you’re still growing and facing struggles, you are confident in who God made you to be and His love for you. Teach us! What do you wish you had known earlier? My guess is that you will continue to learn about who God created you to be and how He loves you.

Notice a theme? Wherever you are, celebrate the unique way God made you and the incredible way He loves you. And if you celebrate with a cupcake? Even better!

Shared by: Mandy Mianecki

 

                                                                                                                        

dreamtogether-linkup

An InLinkz Link-up


Filed Under: The Dream Journey, The Ups and Downs of Dreaming

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Good Good Father & The #DreamTogether Linkup

November 7, 2016 By Mandy Mianecki 2 Comments

Even If I Don't Understand-Good Good Father

Good Good Father

Seven different piles surrounded me on the carpet of my bedroom floor: a small mountain of mismatched socks, fluffy bath towels and wash cloths, never fully clean 5T boys tees and jeans, three separate girls’ stacks, and my own sweaters and leggings. A Casting Crowns playlist wafted from my phone to distract me from my dislike of the never-ending task that is our laundry.

Glancing at the next songs on the playlist, I noticed a new one: Good Good Father. Anxiety rose like steam within me, an immediate, visceral reaction to the mere title. My muscles tensed as if I were bracing myself for against an attack.

I couldn’t listen to it.

Skip. Scroll. Next song, please.

I felt like a failure and fraud because the song didn’t instantly evoke an, “Amen! Yes, my God is awesome!” response in me.

My mind told me that this is something I should believe, live, and share, but my heart hurt.

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I was afraid to ask myself if I really believed it. Is God really good? Is he my good father? I wanted to believe he is; yet, what I felt was the weight of the suffering in my life and those of my loved ones. A myriad of questions and decades of distorted notions about the nature of God, suffering, and what he really wants for me gripped my heart.

I know the theological answers. My bookshelves house the apologetics books. However, I struggled to disentangle my heart from the interpretations and applications that countless religious authorities and random people advocated as “what God wants.”

So, I let myself question. I wrestled, and still do, with suffering and the heart of God. Is it God’s plan for us to suffer or live abundantly? Or to live abundantly in the midst of suffering? Does God want our sacrifices and reparations or for us to find joy in each detail of daily walk with him? Does he call some people to extreme suffering or all of us?

I know that the existence of suffering doesn’t negate God’s goodness. I know that sin introduced pain and suffering in the world and that God allows it. Free will and all that. I know God redeems suffering. I know good things don’t always feel pleasant.

But. I’ve stared in the face of evil and lives devastated, and the wounds are real. When those wounds are soul-deep, and healing is a lifetime process, and truly embracing love is the hardest thing…the words good, good father can feel like a slap.

So, I didn’t listen to Good Good Father. Part of me prayed and questioned. Part of me rolled my eyes like a petulant child whenever the song came on the radio. But, I kept asking God to show me who he really is, how he loves, and what he wants for me. I asked him to let me experience his love in ways I never have, ways that exceed my comprehension.

I paid attention to people I trusted who talked about God as a good father. However, I didn’t actually believe them…until I heard their story. I needed to know their pain, their wounds, before I could begin to wrap my mind around a good God.

I started letting the song play when it came on the radio. I listened to the lyrics. I didn’t embrace it, but I listened.

You’re a good, good Father. It’s who you are. It’s who you are. It’s who you are. I knew I was supposed to believe this, but I didn’t embrace it.

I am loved by you. It’s who I am. It’s who I am. It’s who I am. This I believed. I’ve spent last several years embracing this bit by bit. But what does it look like for God to love me in my wounds? What does he think of my wounds? I wasn’t sure.

I came across a video by Sarah and Phil Robbins on the power of prayer. Watching it, I experienced a moment when something in me shifted. Though I’d heard the general ideas they shared many times in my life, something in the way they spoke changed something in me. Among other things, they spoke about the nature of God and how they prayed over everything in their lives. They mentioned the song Good Good Father specifically, sharing how they sing it and pray it over their infant son daily.

I began intentionally listening to Good, Good Father. (Chris Tomlin version) I started meditating on the lyrics. I even sang them out loud.

You’re a good, good father.

You are perfect in all of your ways.

I am loved by you.

I don’t understand it completely, but I know these are the basics.

God is good. His plan is perfect, even when I don’t understand. My identity is being loved by him.

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I try to imagine how it looks when I love my children to the best of my ability. How do I think of them? What do I want for them?

How I see the payoffs of them enduring through hard things, even when they can’t see it.

I think of the people who love me well and what they want for me. I trust them. Then I think of how God loves perfectly, exponentially better than me and the humans I trust. It begins to help me understand a little more.

So, I sing:

You’re a good, good Father. It’s who you are. It’s who you are. It’s who you are.

I am loved by you. It’s who I am. It’s who I am. It’s who I am.

As he tends to do, God changed me. I now crave this song. It has become a part of my morning routine to orient me for each day.

It often brings tears to my eyes because each time I focus on the lyrics, I am affirming that I believe God is my good father. I believe he is perfect, and who I am…is loved by him.

This doesn’t mean life is easy, however. I still have very little “figured out.” For me, it means I am grounded in a firm foundation. It’s putting on my armor each day of this God-sized dreaming journey, prepared as best I can be, for whatever the day holds.

It’s where I am. It’s where I am. It’s where I am.

I am loved by him.

Photo credit: Nick Kenrick

Shared by: Mandy Mianecki

                                                  

dreamtogether-linkup

An InLinkz Link-up


Happy to join @GodsizeDreams for their #DreamTogether linkup! Join me!

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Filed Under: Fears Tossing Your Dream

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When Disappointments and Roadblocks Come

August 1, 2016 By Mandy Mianecki 2 Comments

#godsizeddreams

#godsizeddreams

The peppermint brownies were baked, their aroma wafting through my kitchen. Lemon hummus and citrus water kept them company on the refreshment table.

My house was clean. Decluttered, vacuumed, and swept. A royal blue tablecloth decorated my dining room table, with an array of DIY supplies arranged on top: glass jars, Epsom salt, spray bottles, essential oils, measuring cups, funnels…

My children were occupied. I was ready. Soon, eager friends and acquaintances would file in to enjoy a couple of hours of fellowship and project time.

I invited several women. I had brainstormed a list, gathered my courage to contact them, and even touched base with them a day or two leading up. I was excited for this time and for the possibilities it held for advancing my natural wellness business.

Two friends showed up.

Despite my diligence, only two followed through with participating in the event I had carefully planned. Even with a reminder the previous day, one just plain forgot. Others didn’t respond at all to the invitation.

That meant taking a loss on the supplies I bought. Immediately, the negative thoughts threatened to take over my mind—and the event. Fears about my ability to work my business loomed over me.

And yet, I had two lovely friends in my home. We chatted, we laughed, we made some fun projects that smelled incredible. I caught up with the events in their lives. If it had been just one of them, it would still have been worth it.

Yes, disappointment still lingered, but I realized I had a choice: let it get me down, or learn and grow from it.

I knew that:

  • This wasn’t a reflection on me personally.
  • Those who came enjoyed themselves.
  • This was an opportunity to learn new skills about putting on events.
  • There are ups and downs to business. A “down” doesn’t mean failure.
  • I just had to keep going. Giving up because of low turnout was not an option.
  • I had encouraging people surrounding me who would help me going forward.
  • My attitude would make or break my business going forward.

***

Even when we know that the dreams we are pursuing are from God, we will eventually hit roadblocks. There is no dreamer who has a perfect day every day of her journey.

And that’s okay!

We know going in to expect this, to make sure to have a support system in place to weather the tough stages, to set our mind on God’s plan for our dream, and most of all, to stay in tune with the Dream-giver.

A challenge on the journey doesn’t mean we’re pursuing the wrong dream.

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It simply means we need to press in close to hear God’s voice. To have him filter our thoughts and emotions. To point us in the direction in which he wants us to go.

Remembering that my job is obedience, not results, takes much of the pressure off. (Thank you to God-sized dreamer Holley Gerth for that bit of wisdom.)

Realistically, those feelings of disappointment at a less than stellar outcome do happen. It’s good and healthy to feel them and then assign them to their proper place and move on.

So, whisper a prayer, take a deep breath, and then go! Make that phone call. Book that event. Make that speech. Take that leap.

Dream that dream, and then do it!

Shared by: Mandy Mianecki

Filed Under: The Ups and Downs of Dreaming, When Your Dream Hits a Roadblock

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A Force Behind My Dreams

May 23, 2016 By Mandy Mianecki 4 Comments

GSDMay2016

My parochial elementary school added weekly art classes when I was in third grade. That made Wednesday my favorite day. Our first project consisted of transforming our cursive-written names into colorful insect pictures. The image of Mrs. Moran’s loops and swirls, tracing, copying, and filling spaces with bright reds and blues remains fresh in my memory.

Something in me came alive with that little project, and soon I moved on to projects like copying pictures from my coloring books. Pencil drawings of Aladdin and Jasmine filled my sketchbook. By eighth grade, all my classmates knew I wanted to become an animator for Disney.

Behind that creative spirit was a mom who cheered me on. Not once in my life did I hear that pursuing the arts was a frivolous endeavor or money wasted. In fact, my mom and I regularly attended art and craft shows for inspiration. For several years, treks to Ann Arbor’s summer art fair on the University of Michigan’s campus were our summer standard—mile after mile of ceramic, photographic, textile, sculptural, and painted masterpieces waited for us. Together.

We frequented Ann Arbor for artist dates to feed our creative thirst throughout the year too. Roaming the aisles of decorative papers and bookmaking supplies at Hollander’s in the historic Kerrytown shops filled my creative tank for weeks. Attending a bookmaking workshop there together opened up a thrilling possibility: attending and teaching at a local altered arts conference.

Vulnerability lies at the heart of creative expression. My best work reveals my truest self, and sharing that with my mother at the conference workshops in which we created art together, and through the years, has been powerful.

Being truly seen has been fundamental to a thriving life.

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To be seen, appreciated, and encouraged in my art, in being the person God made me to be, has been fundamental to a thriving life. It’s a precious gift that God has given me. So, it’s not surprising that it is also fuel for God-sized dreams, like creating a solo exhibition of original artwork as my senior project in college, traveling across the country for a 2-week art intensive for college credit, earning my Bachelor of Fine Arts degree, and continuing to create as each season of my life allows.

Grateful is an understatement for this undeserved blessing in my relationship with my mother. I realize that a relationship like this is one that not everyone enjoys, and I pray that I never take it for granted. If you struggle with mother wounds, it is my prayer that Jesus wraps you in His love and brings into your life those people who will walk alongside you and cheer wildly for who you are.

This space is your safe place to pursue who God made you to be. We love having you here. Thank you for being a part of our community.

And thank you, Mom, for being amazing. I love you!

Shared by: Mandy Mianecki

Filed Under: Community, Living Your Dream

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Help A Girl Out! {How To Fulfill A Dream}

March 21, 2016 By Mandy Mianecki 2 Comments

How to fulfill a dream (Help a girl out!)

GSDMarch

Those who know me will tell you: I’m an abstract thinker, an idea girl, intuitive, and emotional.

A dreamer.

Although I get some drive and organization from my dad, detailed plans don’t come naturally to me.

Without a plan, dreams remain dreams.

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So, I continually work to grow in the practical areas of pursuing dreams.

My current dream is to expand my business in order to achieve financial freedom, time freedom, and charitable giving freedom. Over the past few years, I’ve discovered some resources that aid me in achieving the steps needed to make progress in this dream. Here are some of my favorites:

1. Pray.

I make it a point to give my business to God and ask for His direction each day. I ask how He would have me spend my time and who He wants me to share my message of wellness, purpose, and abundance with that day. I ask Him to send me those people He has planned to join my educational team, and I pray for each member of my team and all my customers.

2. Personal Development.

I’m always in the middle of a book, video, webinar, or business call to learn more leadership skills. I search out wisdom from those who’ve been where I want to go. Some of my favorites:

You’re Already Amazing (the book and the Life Growth Guide), by Holley Gerth

You’re Made for a God-sized Dream, by Holley Gerth

Oola: Finding Balance in an Unbalanced World, by Troy Amdahl and Dave Braun

3. A Tribe.

I try to spend most of my time and devote most of my energy to the people who build me up, understand me, and encourage me. These are people like my business mentors, the ladies who write for this site, select family members, and good friends. The reverse is also true: I try to listen as little as possible to the negative voices around me.

4. Train Your Brain.

Said another way: attitude is everything. Becoming disciplined in taking control of my thoughts and emotions has seriously aided me in progressing in my dreams. It’s actual science! Dr. Caroline Leaf has written multiple books about the way our thoughts can literally make us sick–or keep us healthy. Speaking and believing truth paves the way for gratitude, contentment, joy, and good choices. Check out Dr. Leaf’s Who Switched Off My Brain.

5. Daily inspiration.

I do a lot of business work online, so I intentionally follow encouraging people or ministries on Facebook. I love when my feed blows up with encouraging quotes, truth, and motivation. Check out:

Dr. Caroline Leaf

Oola

Toni Cooper Performance

Richard Bliss Brooke

Lysa TerKeurst

Christine Caine

Toby Mac

As you can see, even my list of “practical” helps is somewhat abstract. I promise I have a big-girl planner with a calendar chock full of goals, action steps, and appointments. However,

It’s when I’m filled, energized, and directed that I make progress toward my dreams.

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I’d love to know. What are your favorite tools for realizing your dreams?

Shared by: Mandy Mianecki

p.s. We launched our God-sized Dreams shop! It contains five downloadable prints created just for you. We hope they inspire you to chase after your dreams! We’d love for you to check them out! And as a thank-you to our email subscribers, once a month we will randomly choose one subscriber to receive a FREE print!

Dream. Shop. Inspire. God-sized Dreams new print shop!

Filed Under: The Dream Journey

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On Fear, Risk, And Vulnerability

January 11, 2016 By Mandy Mianecki Leave a Comment

GSD for Jan16

During her keynote speech at Allume one year, Ann Voskamp shared a story that not only stuck with me, but it also transformed the way I think about my relationships and decision making. She told of a time when her family attended a church event and her children were playing outside. Near the church were woods and a lake. One daughter asked how far away she could go while playing. She expected a concrete answer, but Ann’s husband replied, “If you can no longer hear my voice, you’ve gone too far.”

If you can no longer hear my voice, you’ve gone too far.

I’d been used to clearly defined boundaries, rules: Executing x, y, and z was the way to live life—and also gain approval and a sense of worth. I was the dutiful wife with a home-cooked dinner each evening; the housekeeper with mattress pads and matching bedding on each bed, laundry washed, dried, folded, and put away; the successful parent with well-disciplined children who wore matching socks; the faithful friend who sent birthday cards and scheduled play dates.

In short, I believed I had to do it all and do it well. I also believed that if I didn’t, God would not be pleased with me. Isn’t that the diligent, productive life the one He wanted for me?

Ann’s brief story highlighted for me that there is a different way to relate. Rather than perform to certain perceived standards, I could live in relationship with others.

It’s actually much more challenging in some respects. Rules can be clearly spelled out. You know when you’ve broken them. On the other hand, being in relationship requires engaging in the messiness of your life and those of others. It demands self-reflection and investing in other people.

Functioning in the abstract of real life relationships is risky. It involves making mistakes and learning from them. It requires vulnerability, and vulnerability is scary.

Brené Brown explains it well in her book The Gifts of Imperfection: Let Go of Who You Think You’re Supposed to Be and Embrace Who You Are:

To love someone fiercely, to believe in something with your whole heart, to celebrate a fleeting moment in time, to fully engage in a life that doesn’t come with guarantees – these are risks that involve vulnerability and often pain. But, I’m learning that recognizing and leaning into the discomfort of vulnerability teaches us how to live with joy, gratitude and grace.

Brene Brown also talks about values like courage and living with your whole heart being stronger than your fear. You may be fearful to try something new—a project, a job, a relationship—because you may fail. However, even in the event of a perceived failure, you’ve chosen to live your values. You’ve been authentic.

Sounds a little like the life of a God-sized dreamer, doesn’t it? So, what’s a dreamer to do concretely with that fear?

I will ask myself a few questions:

  • What am I afraid of specifically?
  • What’s the worst that can happen?
  • What is the likelihood that the worst will happen?
  • If it does, then what?

I find that my worst case scenarios rarely, if ever, play out. I have always survived and even thrived when things don’t go as planned. In other words, fear is just a bully!

Fear is a big fat liar standing in the way of your greatness.

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So, dreamer, call fear out. Look it straight in the eye and tell it who’s boss. Refuse to let it box you into a small world of perceived safety. Instead, push through with confidence, knowing you’re flourishing in the much more fulfilling world of authenticity.

 

Shared by: Mandy Mianecki

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Filed Under: Fears Tossing Your Dream, The Ups and Downs of Dreaming

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Leaving A Dreaming Legacy

December 14, 2015 By Mandy Mianecki 1 Comment

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“Can I use these, Mom?”

She cups the empty containers in her hands: a hot chocolate tin, a glass jar once home to bath salts, and a salsa jar. She’s envisioning Duck Tape treasures. Probably a craft sale extravaganza too.

She sets them down amidst a stash of purses, flowers, headbands, and bracelets…a Duck Tape bonanza.

“What can I make from this?” is a FAQ for this twelve year old. She transforms jars. Covers folders. Repurposes milk cartons. Creativity oozes from her, a trait I’m eager to see translate into her adult life.

***

“I’m going to be an art teacher when I grow up. Or an architect who builds her buildings,” her sister says.

And I see it…as she follows her dad around asking, “Can I help you put it together, Dad?” Whether it’s a cabinet, bookshelf, or home repair, she’ll do it. How the pieces fit together makes sense to her. She’ll draw it on paper or put it together in 3D.

Whatever her future holds, it will be hands on.

***

 “It’s okay, Sweetie,” sister #2 consoles her toddler brother. She gently wraps her arms around him and squeezes.  She’s perfected the combination of snorts and facial contortions that will elicit giggles from him. They bound around the house as buddies.

He misses her when she’s gone all day at school.

She extends her snuggles to me, too.  Her most frequent statement reveals her tender nature: I love you, Mom!

***

As for her brother…it’s stack a thing, then knock down. Fill it up, then empty it. Open it, then close it. Press the button. Dump it out. Climb on it. Explore, explore, explore.

It’s hard to guess what he’s thinking at three years old, but it’s clear that curiosity drives him. My bet is that his chosen occupation will either be engineer or demolitionist.

I won’t lie. These endearing interests and talents include their downsides…mostly messes. But, it’s worth it to witness their God-given personalities shine through. They’re driven to pursue their own interests, and they know what they’re good at.

Letting them explore those gifts and interests gives both of us hints at what God might have in store for their futures.

Letting kids explore their gifts and interests gives us hints at God’s plan for their futures.

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It’s the starting point for their dreams.

As much as I reasonably can, I encourage their giftings. “What do you think you’d like to do when you grow up?” is my FAQ to them.

I smile when my seven year old answers with “waitress,” knowing she simply enjoys eating at restaurants and serving others.

Their dreams begin with learning who God made them to be. Giving children the freedom to explore the unique qualities God planted in them is to gift them with permission to dream God-sized dreams.

Gift your children with permission to dream God-sized dreams.

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 ***

What unique qualities do you see in your children?

How do you encourage them to dream?

Shared by: Mandy Mianecki

Filed Under: Building A Dream Team, Dreaming Big

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The Impact of Gratitude

November 6, 2015 By Mandy Mianecki 6 Comments

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“Have you looked through the Family Christian catalog?” my mom asked. “There’s a book that has a woman holding a bird’s nest on the cover. It looks good.”

I hadn’t. I looked at my baby number four, my boy, crawling around the gated-in living room, weeks away from his first birthday. Keeping his monkey-self alive amidst the blur of being a homeschooling mom qualified as my main accomplishment. And it exhausted me.

How would I find time for the luxury of reading a whole book?

I listened politely, considering this book to be Mom’s thing. “Sounds great, Mom. Go for it! Let me know how you like it.”

Mom had other plans. She ordered two copies, so how could I not at least take a peek?

You all know Ann Voskamp, right? One Thousand Gifts?

So, yes. Mother knows best. If you haven’t read it, run to your nearest bookstore, or Amazon. I won’t spoil it, but suffice it to say that the desire to record my own 1000 gifts was great about halfway through the book.

I had an idea. It seemed BIG for me at the time. Unique, thrilling. I wondered if anyone had ever created a blog for the sole purpose of counting gifts… (It’s okay, go ahead and laugh with me.)

Imagine my delight at discovering that Ann had a whole blogging community sharing their gift lists through a weekly link up. And so it began, my numbered list of gratitudes: the sunlight through the sliding glass doors, belly laughs from my boy, chocolate birthday cake…

Counting slowed my pace and encouraged me to really see the world around me. Even more, I was eager to identify the things, large and small, that delighted me each day—God’s little (and sometimes big!) love notes to me.

It was a path to joy, and it opened my spirit to a much more abundant way of living—a way necessary for this dreamer-girl.

Dreamers can’t thrive in a world of scarcity. Dreams die with a poverty mentality. (<====Click to tweet.)

Why? Because scarcity thrives on the lie that there is a limited amount of any given thing. Ever wonder if you should quit because someone else is doing what you want to do? Question whether there is room for your voice? Assume there is no way to get to where you want to be?

Scarcity.

The truth is that there are dreams enough for everyone. There is no need to compare and evaluate your own against anyone else’s.

On the other hand, an abundance mindset, fueled by gratitude, provides a sense of security in your own dream and enables you to come alongside others to help them thrive in theirs. It turns your attention outward to be a gift to other dreamers.

A God-sized dream is more of what God has for you, and gratitude is the reception of His abundant love for you. (<====Click to tweet.) His love makes whatever He has planned possible, tailored just for you.

So take heart, dreamers. Your dreams are secure because His love never ends. Are you ready for the abundance He’ll bring to the adventures you’ll have together?

Shared by: Mandy Mianecki

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Filed Under: Fears Tossing Your Dream, The Ups and Downs of Dreaming

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