Walk prudently when you go to the house of God; and draw near to hear rather than to give the sacrifice of fools, for they do not know that they do evil. Do not be rash with your mouth, And let not your heart utter anything hastily before God. For God is in heaven, and you on earth;
Therefore let your words be few. (Ecclesiastes 5:1-2 (NKJV))
Hear my confession. In my early years dreaming God-Sized Dreams, I took the joy I found in writing and supposed it to be the dream I was to build and dedicate to the Glory of God. I meant well , but I was entirely wrong.
I forgot that He was God alone, supposing instead that I could partner with Him. I was not listening to be available to do His Will.
I was trying to lead and getting in His Way.
An innocent mistake, I see now that it took me journeying along in the wilderness much like the Children of Israel, who wandered 40 years out of the way on a 40-day trip. So desperate was I to make sense of my “exile,” I reasoned that God determined me to be an outsider.
Or so I thought.
It usefully distracted me from my on-going misery about the fullness of joy lacking in my life. I was always mad, disappointed with God that the Joy and the Peace I knew so many experienced eluded me. What’d I do wrong?
The wrong was all in the doing…
My testimony is not so much that I was lost and now am found, but that I was dying spiritually, disconnected from The Vine, busying myself. I was longing for intimacy with God beyond anything I’d ever achieved previously. Or at least I thought so. I was reminded once again that God is always working in the background. Despite the appearance of wilderness, death, and dry bones, there was a Holy Ghost riot happening at the roots of my soul. Finally, it is good to return to the land of the living.
How did I return, you ask? I stopped fighting God. I stopped being angry, stopped filling my time, and quietly waited upon God. Oh, and there is one more thing. When God called, I simply said Yes.
What happened? Not the things I thought might. (and this is not a happily wrapped story ending, as God is not through with me yet). New things. New adventures. New perspectives on the world. New relationships, and yes, new calls from God.
I am more joyful than I’ve ever been, and while everything is not rosy, my perspective has changed (Perspective is key). I worry less and rely upon God more. And, when I get nervous, I remind myself, sometimes audibly, that He has Never Failed.
Here is the takeaway-let’s agree that dreaming is hard. Let’s concede that it takes a certain foolhardy bravery that is part faith and part stubborn tenacity. Anybody putting forth that much effort just to get to the starting line deserves a full serving of Grace.
And there is one other thing.
Do not be rash with your mouth, and let not your heart utter anything hastily before God. For God is in heaven, and you on earth; Listen more, and lead less, if at all.
(He doesn’t need your help.)
Shared by: Chelle Wilson